Home.

Hey,

So I'm back in Fort William the now for Easter, until Sunday, when I depart for Italy for a week. I cannot wait for the trip, although going by bus for two days via a ferry will be interesting to put it lightly.

I am in Fort William until then however. This, despite the hush that follows you everywhere in this town, is not too bad. Today is my Grandfather's birthday (he's 70, if you are wondering) so that will be some sort of family shindig. The rest of my family arrive on Friday, so that is all very exciting. Another way to pass the time has been the reunion between myself and the xbox, and what a beautiful reunion it has been. To celebrate the reunion I hired "Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2", probably the best game out (debate among yourself). Unfortunately this meant doing the "Airport" level on, coincidentally, the day Moscow had a terrorist attack. I felt awful, especially when I posted on twitter that I had "I just killed shitloads of innocent Russians. Sweet. #callofduty" without realising what exactly I had said. I still feel bad about that tweet.

Also started watching "Yes Minister" which for a political mind like mine (I like to think) is hilarious. It's set in the Department for Administrative Affairs following the minister Jim Hacker and how he is manipulated into policies by the experienced Civil Service.

In many regards, the origins of "The Thick of It" are quite evident. "The Thick of It" is set in a department of similar importance, which is a bit of a governmental graveyard. The influence of Sir Humphrey in "Yes Minister" can be compared to Malcolm Tucker. If you like "The Thick of It" you will love "Yes Minister", probably even more so if you aren't fond of swearing.

I can't really write much more, for I have nothing more to write. Um, see "the game" last night? That guy was well offside wasn't he? At least he got an away goal for it?

I'll write before I leave on Sunday,

DC x

"The Celtic Way" or "The Winning Way"?

Hey,

I love living in Glasgow for many reasons, one of which is how you can "star" spot some fairly low-level celebrities. It's actually really fun when you notice them in public, because it takes a second to fully appreciate what you are seeing. That "and then it clicks" moment is something that seldom happens in Fort William, unless you consider Steve Peat a celebrity. And I don't. No offence.

I've actually spotted a few faces since I've been here, the list consisting of (drum-roll please):

*David Weir

*The drummer from Franz Ferdinand, you know, the one with bad teeth?

*Shaun Maloney

*Neil Lennon

*The lead from Twin Atlantic and today

*Bobby the bar man from "Still Game" (he has a name, no doubt, but if I just said his name it would be fairly insignificant. Then again, "Still Game" hasn't been on for years. The point is I would see anyone like this in Fort William, ok?)

It's quite interesting that Neil Lennon is on that list considering it is unlikely I'll be seeing Tony Mowbray in my jaunts around Glasgow. Mowbray was sacked by Celtic after "that" defeat to St. Mirren (see previous blog) which was the icing on a cake consisting of bad defending, poor tactics and an absence of luck. The caretaker manager for now is Neil Lennon.

Watching his first press interview today was interesting. Lennon is the only figurehead left from the Martin O'Neill era, and it showed during the press conference. He referred to the current team as being soft and sensitive, and answered the question of playing football "the Celtic way". "The Celtic way" of playing football, apparently, is to not only win football matches, but to win them with style and flair. This mentally is counter-productive, since it's tough to play beautiful football with the players Celtic can afford these days. Also, this way of football has never truly been successful since Jock Stein, whose superb team was an one-off and a reminder of just drastically football has changed in the last forty years.

When asked about the "Celtic way" Lennon simply said "the Celtic way is to win", and he is right. Under O'Neill Celtic could play decent football, but first and foremost they were tough. Really tough. The defence had the metaphorical height of the Alps, with Bobo Balde, Stan Varga and even Ulrik Laursen and the midfield had Paul Lambert and Lennon himself (who were strong in the tackle and in the shoulder). With the brilliance of Henrik Larsson was Chris Sutton or John Hartson, who would bully defences with their physical presence. Much of Rangers' success under Walter Smith has been with similar tactics. This is not to say Celtic weren't skilful either back then (Petrov, Thompson, Larsson, Moravcik etc) but they just had more of a spine than what the current squad have, although the budgets between now and 2000 are vastly different.

I don't know how well Lennon will do as caretaker manager, I'm quite sure he doesn't know either. But if there is one thing Celtic are lacking the now it is leadership, which I'm sure he can provide.

DC

x

Celtic, Cider, Crap.

Hey,

Sometimes I wish I was more cultured. When I (seldom) go to exhibits or museums I feel like I should be more impressed than what I am by what is on display. I know a drawing should be able to blow me away, and I can understand the difficulties in creating a masterpiece, but I have never been able to gasp with astonishment at a portrait the way I could gasp at say a football stadium. As much as I loved my trip to London last year, the highlight was not going to a West End production but to seeing the Emirates Stadium. When I buy a broadsheet I read the Sports, News and Opinions (in that order). The quaint supplements provided with the paper - " 2 or what have you - is almost always ignored.

This is a very fanciful (and in many factual instances wrong) introduction to the point that I wish Celtic would stop losing. I am a Celtic fan, a pretty big follower I like to think. But this evening they lost again. This time it was bad. Really bad. 4-0 to St. Mirren to be precise, possibly the worst defeat since the 5-0 defeat to Artmedia Bratislava (who?) in 2005.

I should maybe rephrase all that. I do not regret being a Celtic fan; it consumed my childhood and I loved it. I still do love those big European nights, I still swear like hell at Kyle Lafferty, I still remember all the useless trivia. It's just when you are use to your team being successful, to lose on a seemingly regular occurrence just hurts really, really badly. Almost as badly as today's Budget.

Now that is an exaggeration for which I apologise for. Alistair Darling's Budget today was for the most part fairly solid I thought, and it ticked most of my boxes. Bar one. The tax increase on cider. Why cider? Why me? Why not Buckfast? Why not fags again? Why?

I'm not the only one feeling like this; I have trending topics on Twitter and Facebook petitions to back me up and everything. I doubt I've never felt so British as when I saw "White Lightening" trending above Alistair Darling. I've never felt so proud to British for so many reasons, most noticeably the spelling mistakes.

However I am also realistic: 10% is not that much of an increase, really, it's just the principle of it. And besides, it would take prohibition and copious amounts Meow (don't know what it is? Follow the link at the bottom) to change my vote in May.

Night night.

http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=brass+eye+cake&page=&utm_source=opensearch

DC
x

European Supermarket.

Hey,

So I was in Edinburgh visiting family and the like over the weekend, when for some reason or another we had to go to "Makro". I had never heard of Makro or knew of its existance, but I was in for a treat.

"Makro" is essentially a supermarket for businesses to collect their stock on bulk. Due to the needs of businesses, everything about Makro is huge. Really huge. Until Sunday, I did not have a clue what 2.5kg of tea bags looked like. Guess what. It's huge. 1150 teabags to be precise. I felt like I was in one of those massive foriegn shops. Which took my mind to this old Adam and Joe song "European Supermarket". The link is at the bottom.

Not much else to say, really. Term finishes tomorrow, which is bizarre. I've said this before and I know I'm not funny when I repeat myself all the time, but it's just difficult to get my head around is all. Two weeks today I'll be in Italy. Amazing.

DC

x

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5JycJf1hYs8

In John Lewis, Clothes Buy You!

Hey,

As you may or may not know, I do Central and Eastern European Studies (CEES) at University. What this means is that for the last year I've been learning about the Communist period in the Soviet Union (Lenin, Stalin, Breshnev, Gorbachev etc). The propaganda they used was farcical, ranging from calling each other "Comrade" to depicting life in the West as very similar to the musical "Oliver". In the 1970s. Seriously.

I bet for a second you thought I wasn't going to talk about TV for once (because this is what this blog has become effectively) but no. I'm going to stick to form. I write about the Soviet Union this morning due to the show on BBC the now "Inside John Lewis". Not a bizarre interactive biology experiment, "Inside John Lewis" follows the business which is trying to see out the recession successfully. It would be an interesting program as it is, but to make it a bit different is that John Lewis is not a business but a "partnership" which all the staff "own".

At John Lewis, you are not staff. You are a "partner". The pay structure restricts the men at the top getting extortionate wages (the chief executive can only get 75 times that of the lowest paid staff/partner, a lot of money nonetheless but significantly less to other companies).

The question I pose is this: is John Lewis the socialist ideal? The partners are effectively shareholders in John Lewis, meaning they are involved in a generous "profit share" system. John Lewis Partnership also own resorts for their partners to go on holiday to. The people who work there appear to love the place. They adhere to this "one for all, all for one" ideology.

John Lewis, like all businesses currently, are struggling in the current recession. "Slim-lining" the company has meant the "R" word: redundancies. It doesn't matter whether you are staff, comrade or partner. You are disposable, a weight that must be relieved to keep the business' head above water.

I don't know if John Lewis will suffer a similar fate to that of the Soviet Union in the late 1980s/early 1990s. I don't really "do" economics or business or anything like that. But by using my wee bit of political knowledge if I was to hear it were to fall I wouldn't be overtly surprised. The similarities are a bit odd, considering one was an empire (or as good as) and the other is a shop. Just a shop. John Lewis' unique "partnership" system is retail socialism. If John Lewis becomes an institution to be lost in this economic climate (ie like Woolworths) it will be because they tried to cover to many different objects on too vast a scale. With the internet and competitive high streets, to expect a shop to cover everything and more is just a bit too unrealistic. You can't expect the same shop to cover televisions as well as perfume? It's a bit like the Soviet Union trying to hold on to the Baltic States and the republics of central Asia. Fifty years ago both could be done, now not so much.

This is top-level procrastination, by the way. I have an essay due for Wednesday in CEES (of all subjects). To find a comparison between a shop and post-war Stalinism I think is quite impressive. It's not, but I'll keep telling myself this. It makes it better for me.

DC x

Glee. Again.

Hey,

That previous blog turned out to be quite serious, didn't it? Sorry about that. No, seriously I am. Can I make it up to you? Slag off Glee you say? Oh, just for you then..

To be fair, I haven't slagged off "Glee" in a good while. It just slipped off my iPlayer schedule of programs I watch on a regular basis. It's been so long since I had watched Glee that on the Channel 4 website it was nearly not available anymore.

I didn't expect anything different. It has not changed one bit, it's still a massive sing-a-long with awkward relationships forming everywhere you look amongst the cast. The neat freak one with the Glee teacher guy? Her fiancée with the Glee teacher guy? Sue? I should really pay more attention to the names, but they don't matter really. They aren't real people, they are characters. So their feelings won't get hurt. Easy.

Yet - and here is a shock - I actually found myself laughing at parts in Glee, albeit slightly. There's a scene in which the jock guy (names again) is trying it on with annoying girl (Rachel? Is her name Rachel? She looks like a Rachel) and says something along the lines of "I'm a Jew, you're a Jew" to work his ways on her. Classy. Will I get to the end of Glee? Or will Glee get to the end of me? I really don't know.

In other news, has anyone seen my first year at University? I don't know where it has gone.

DC x

It's just not fucking funny.

Hey,

Much has been said about BBC Three. It's apparent immunity from the major cuts happening at the moment, seemingly at the expense of others such as BBC 6Music has made it as an easy victim to throw abuse at. "Snog, Marry, Avoid?"? Oh, we the intellects are far superior to that nonsense. "Hotter than my Daughter"? I'd rather watch a Glee mash-up.

Us "BBC Four" types find it too easy to criticise the decisions of the powers that be to continue the funding of this TV station, and it's - at times - mind-numbing content. Put on "Newswipe" or a program featuring Marcus Brigstocke and we are can feel better. We can experience intellectual snobbery.

I was actually going to spend today defending the BBC's backing of BBC Three which, truth be told, would not of been as difficult as you would think. BBC Three, for it's many faults, has produced some excellent comedy amongst the awful. For every "HTMD" there is backing of "The Mighty Boosh" from radio to television so successfully. Same could be said of "Little Britain". Some of my favourite comedies from the USA are shown on BBC Three, also.

Yet yesterday changed my mind. Whilst browsing the delights of iPlayer (in my opinion, the BBC's best asset) I came across the program titled "Tourettes: I Swear Can't Help It". It's a show which follows two sufferers of the illness, documenting their daily struggle.

Although the program is done on the most part quite tastefully, it does contain scenes that some would snigger at, but this program was commissioned for BBC Three, the channel's station for comedy and light-hearted program. My concern is that the show was commissioned not to raise awareness of the disease (which has 300,000 sufferers in the UK) but for a cheap laugh at someone else's expense. And that is just not right. The young boy who has a form of tourettes which means he constantly screams is just not funny at all. Nor should it be.

DC x

Academic Years End Too Soon.

Hey,

Sorry I haven't blogged much recently. I really am. I could easily put it down to watching "Threads" (see previous blog - possibly the most depressing thing I have ever seen. Ever.) Truth be told though I have been a bit lazy in my approach to writing this blog. Why this new attitude has overcome me I am not so sure; this blog, no matter how hopeless, can still be used as a portfolio. It's not as if I haven't got stuff to write about either, because I do. I don't know, I just haven't got round to it.

The most worrying thing is that in a matter of weeks this blog will revert back to it's original state of ultra-depression. Though summer still seems like a long-shot, it is not. University - exams aside - finishes next Wednesday and after my hockey trip to Rimini at the beginning of April it is essentially Morrisons. Again. Summer number four. Oh lord.

But we will not think of such events just yet! Let's be enthusiastic! Last night, I went to my first gig in what feels like an age; You Me At Six at the o2 Academy (or Carling Academy for those who crave nostalgia but lack the sense to see the irony in it's changing of merely a sponsorship deal). The evening was splendid, I thought. You Me At Six were on fine form, and it's probably the best I have seen them live, far better than the Paramore gig.

The night was funny in other aspects, not related to the music itself. For one, watching the exponential rise of the band, in literally a matter of months, has been staggering. When I saw them at Avalanche in September it was a big-ish crowd. But last night, the o2 was sold out, like properly sold out. One of my friends started queuing at 2pm. The doors opened at seven. The night was too big for some girls, who having fell out over some issue regarding tickets/I.D./being emo started scrapping infront of everyone waiting outside. It was fine que viewing. The gig also highlighted the influence bands (and celebrity culture in general) can have on young impressionable people. Josh Franceschi, the lead singer, effectively stopped the purchasing of counterfeit merchandise last night by telling the crowd not to. It makes you wonder what he could get away with saying. For example, he could easily say "don't buy Dairy Lea, it makes my skin go all weird" and I'm sure some kids would stop eating it just for a mention on Twitter. His skills are limited, however, when he told everyone to get out of their seats, which the people on the balcony could not do. Despite the power of words, the power cannot overcome health and safety, it seems.

As I mentioned earlier, "Threads" scared the living daylights out of me. Essentially, it's what would happen if a nuclear bomb hit Sheffield. Words cannot describe how unnerving a program this is. All I can is what I said previously; watch it yourself.

I experienced the exact opposite of emotions watching "Eddie Izzard: Marathon Man". Watching a man effectively run all over Britain whilst at the same time open up to his childhood pain of bereavement, creating peace in Northern Ireland is truly inspiring, especially when you consider the blisters he has on his feet (I doubt Dr. Paisley would treat him?). The only down said to being inspired by Eddie Izzard is that you get lost in translation. Grant thought I wanted to become a transvestite. And that is not true. At all. OK? Good.

Currently on the campaign trail this week, this time for Leo Howes for GUSA (Glasgow University Sports Association) President. It's kind of a big deal, so if you are studying at Glasgow Uni and have a gym membership, please drop by the Stevenson tomorrow and vote, for David's sake? If you wish to learn more, his manifesto is available at www.tinyurl.com/leo4pres. Thanks!

DC x

p.s. I know it was a while ago but I have proof that my article on the Superbowl was in the Glasgow University Guardian! If you follow the link below you will see it in all it's glory/tiredness.

http://bit.ly/dk8RQ0

Threads

Hey,

I just watched "Threads", the film from 1984. It's on Google Video. (http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-2023790698427111488#)

That's all I'm saying. I can't really say much about it. Watch it yourself.

DC x

Luck.

Hey,

Sorry I haven't really been here in the last week. I've been really busy with essays to write and hockey to play. Also add the visit of Stevie to Glasgow this weekend, adding to the eventfulness of it all. I showed him Glasgow and my hockey acquaintances and a good time was had by all I reckon. Banter is always good. Hockey has been a bit of a nuisance though. I have a match tonight, which will be my third in three days and my fourth since Wednesday. I'm pretty numb from the knees downwards, and it hurts. What also hurts is that we have lost all these games (well, the game yesterday we lost on penalties, so we technically drew), even though we have played quite well in all the games. When luck is not on your side, it is not on your side.

Luck is the main topic of today's blog. Last weekend I did the manly thing and put an accumulator on the football scores, which is something I do not normally do. It was nothing minor, just £1 on six teams to win. To cut a long story short if Bournemouth had won last week I would have won £57.

But I didn't.

See, gambling is just a long list of maybes and could ofs (someone check my grammar there, I know it is not right). It is the stupid tax. I don't think anyone truly wins from gambling, apart from the bookmakers themselves. Sure, there will be those who say "I won £X on the horses" and suchlike, but in the long run chances are you will lose more than you win. It's probabilities, innit.

It cannot be a coincidence there is at least five bookmakers in Maryhill, it just can't. Big bookmakers benefit from the desperation of people, especially the poor. The temptation to try and win easy money is just too strong for some people. The National Lottery has millions of contestants, but the odds of winning the £3million are so long you are probably more likely to be harassed by Tiger Woods. As I say, it's probabilities, innit.

I had made these conclusions last week, before I watched "Louis Theroux on Las Vegas", which is on BBC iPlayer currently. In the show he highlights the way big casinos treat their "loyal" customers is a touch shocking. One client, for instance, gets the biggest suite in North America (supposedly) for when he goes to Vegas. The hint that it makes fiscal sense to sweeten these people up just shows how much money these casinos can suck out of people. It just all seems so wrong.

Anyways, enough of the gambling rant. Luck also played a feature this week as I campaigned for two of my friends in student elections. Unfortunately, both of them lost. Can this be put down to luck? I'm not sure. But when you've lost the election despite winning the most votes (the list system / proportional representation) it feels like luck is against you, sometimes.

For now I shall leave you to get on with your lives, which are very busy I am sure. Hopefully, we will win tonight in this hockey match, we are bound to win eventually.

It's probabilities, innit.

DC x

Gordon "The Italian Stallion" Brown

Hey,

So, as I promised in yesterday's (lack of an) entry, here I am. Are you happy? Excellent.

So, according to the latest poll in the Sunday Times, Gordon Brown is now only 2% points behind David Cameron. Which, as a bit of a Labour man myself, is simply terrific news. For the first time yesterday I genuinely started to feel that Labour might just bloody pull this off! They may actually win the bloody thing! The Great Escape, Rocky, Freaky Friday, whatever film you want to relate this to. It doesn't matter. Considering the gap was 26% points just under two years ago, the only way is up. Hopefully.

Speaking of referring this comeback to a film, I personally prefer comparing it to Rocky. There seems to be similarities between Brown and Balboa; both have dodgy, slurred speech and both underdogs never seem to have a chance. It's like David "Airbrush" Cameron is Ivan Drago, but on a bike.

But if Brown and Labour win in May, like the Rocky movies, it just won't make sense. I may be oblivious - because the presence of the Tories in Scotland would require David Acorah - but it feels like this upsurge has just came out of nowhere. In the last week Brown has discussed how many pints he had as a student on a night out - six, if you are interested - on an interview with Piers Morgan which at times was borderline cringe. Also, he has been accused of being a bully at Downing Street; the head of a Bullying Hotline breaking the code of confidentially (naughty) about certain revelations. Yet support for Brown is on a surge.

It may be because Brown, despite recent allegations (for that is all they are) and the perception his critics will describe may not be true. In the interview with Piers Morgan at times it made your face squint up so tightly you thought you were watching the TV through a letterbox, but it made him look human. A real person.

He is also quite charismatic in Parliament. As the political geek that I am I listen to Prime Ministers Questions on a podcast (I recommend, by the way) and he is actually decent at the comebacks. Last Wednesday he referred to the Conservatives as a party "lead by the airbrush and funded by the off-doms" or something along those lines. It was a soundbite Blair (or even Cameron) would be proud of.

Labour might not win in May, they are still trailing in the opinion polls. But this is looking like 1992 all over again. And I can't wait.

DC x

Looking after my averages.

Hey,

This is barely a blog today, just a quick mention to say that I am still alive. Like you care. Which I doubt.

Anyways, if you are online tomorrow I will treat you with my thoughts, on things such as the likeliness of a Conservative government and gambling. Occasionally the lines overlap.

DC x