Before I burn my eyes with said episodes of said US show I actually forgot to mention that I actually did interesting things the last couple of days. None more as interesting as Saturday's events at the News of the World, with sports journalist John McGarry. I shadowed him as he reported on the match between Kilmarnock and Dundee United. The paltry attendance at the match (just under 5000, in a stadium with a capacity of at least three times this) gives a rough indication of what could've been expected. How wrong the fine people of Ayrshire were.
The match finished 4-4. Now, for non-football followers this will mean little to you. I could say any combination of numbers (19-3, x-3, $34-5%) and would expect the similar reply of "Oh, that's nice. I don't really get football". But the match I was lucky to attend (and also have free access to what are regarded as the best pies in the country) was stupendous.
I use stupendous in the good way, of course, although the defending by both teams was sometimes on parallel to that of a fairly idiotic child, wandering the playground not smart enough to be interested in the sciences but not athletic enough to even attempt sports. Everyone knows a guy like this, right? I'm moving away from the subject here. The point was the standard of defending was dismal, but equally the attacking prowess - of Dundee United especially - was quite satisfying. Craig Conway scored a delicious volley and a wonderful chip within the space of five minutes. Kevin Kyle, who is in essence a big lump of a striker, is actually quite good at being a big lump whilst still maintaining some elements of skill. Say, like Peter Crouch if he was a)ate more porridge and b)a bit worse, I mean, he plays for Kilmarnock after all.
The one player which amused me on the pitch though was a man with an unfortunate surname. For once, this wasn't the Dundee United striker David Goodwillie, who must surely win said award every other match he will ever play in, but a character by the name of Danny Invincible.
Now, with a name like Danny Invincible, you are always heading for a fall. For Invincible not to survive a nuclear holocaust would still be a surprise, purely because of his name. Well, a surprise before the same mushroom cloud quickly turned us into puddles of messiness, but a surprise nonetheless. A name like Invincible should be saved for a Nobel prize winner, not a Kilmarnock midfielder. But blessed with this name he has been, and it's a name he lives with. The ultimate shame is that it doesn't resemble his talents. At all. I feel for him, because I know it can't be fun having a surname which can be joked with. "Childs" has more ammunition than Iraq didn't.
Overall though, I really enjoyed the day. The pre-match build up, the game itself, the pies (very good, but in my personal opinion not the same as those of Firhill "Arena" as Glasgow Warriors insist on calling it), the post-match interviews with the managers and the general combination of my two favourite things; sport and writing. The only problem is that I fear that I will probably never get that dream job I want; written media is dying from 24-hour news channels and the internet. Local newspapers are dying, jobs aren't getting replaced when people retire and there are generally few jobs available. Apparently in the time between my two visits to the News of the World (three years) not one person has been hired. Add a recession into the equation and it all starts to look bleak. Perhaps I was too hasty to leave the fish counter...
Finally, I see that Andy Murray lost. Which I am genuinely gutted about. I don't get Murray-haters, I really do not. We have been blessed with what is - and I use this term in the highest form of respect possible - a sporting freak of nature. A man, who is number three in the world and the future winner of Grand Slams, has come from Scotland. We should be proud of him, not angry because he doesn't smile as much as we would like. He is a genuine national treasure like Susan Boyle or the new Scottish Power Ranger (seriously, there is a Scottish Power Ranger. Unfortunately, his catch phrase is not "I'll set aboot ye!"). We should be treasure him.
DC x
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